lulz

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All this week, I’ve been showing you unusual Valentine gift suggestions from Fiverr, the place where shit gets real for $5.™

We started looking for love in all the wrong places with Spandy Andy, then moved into rapping, heavy sarcasm and a custom video Valentine. And they were all well worth the $5 investment, believe me.

But tonight?

Well, tonight is a religious experience.

- Get your own personal Jesus here

Today I read a post that said "Today, I read a post that said "Today I read a MLIA that said, "Today, I cut my finger. On a slice of pizza. I'm still confused. MLIA." and a reply that said "Don't worry. I broke my tooth. On a waffle. MLIA" Well I beat you both, I broke a braces bracket. Eating ice-cream. MLIA" This reminds me of a time when my friend said "I got a cut on the top of my mouth eating a bagel. We should start an 'unexplainable food incidents' club. MLIA." Well I would like to say that I have burnt myself on the chin. And the object that burned me...a macaroni noodle. The sad thing is I had a burn mark for 2 weeks. It was difficult to explain to people how my mark got there. And yes we should have a unexplainable food incedints club. MLIA

Three months ago, my boyfriend and I went on our second date. Instead of coming into make out on the couch, we decided to sit at the kitchen table and play Life. At the beginning of the game you are asked whether you'd like to go to college or start a career. He picked college, and I jokingly asked him where he would be attending. With a perfectly straight and serious face, he said, "Hogwarts, of course." I knew he was a keeper, then. In six days, he is deploying for one year to Afghanistan, on his second tour. I know that you'd appreciate being posted on this website, Sweetheart. Serve with your unending integrity and come home safely. I love you... even more than Hogwarts.

Today(well every time a bill collector calls), I always answer the phone in my happiest voice saying "Hello, County morgue you stab 'em we bag 'em." Ah im still waiting for it to be a real person and not a machine, but that doesn't make it any less fun. MLIA

submitted by AlphaKlams [link] [12 comments]

Today I was walking in Central Park (New York City) when I saw a man dressed as Waldo run past me followed by a group of people screaming "We've found him!". Nobody around me seemed to thinks that this was out of the ordinary. Only in New York.........MLIA